The winter holidays are typically celebrated with family and friends. However, when divorce splits a family, it can be expected to affect the minor children of the former couple.
As adults who must co-parent, a certain level of civility is required to arrange custody exchanges and other important events. Below are some suggestions that can help bring former partners closer to the goal of making the holidays truly happy for the kids.
The art of compromise
If it was a particularly devastating divorce (at least to one party), it can be a real challenge to set aside any personal animosity and work together for the best interests of the chlid(ren).
Suppose your family tends to gather kin from out-of-town to celebrate the holidays over a groaning table filled with Thanksgiving favorites. However, your family may prefer the traditional Christmas Eve Feast of the Seven Fishes and a late midnight Mass. It’s only common sense to make the swap if the holidays fall on the other parent’s weekend.
Transition Seamlessly
No matter if it’s breaking your heart to watch your kids leave with their co-parent over a holiday, don’t let your children see or sense your sadness. They deserve to enjoy each moment celebrating with their co-parent and family members.
Mediate before trying to litigate
Sometimes, even with both co-parents trying their best to work it out, some situations reach an impasse. Here is where it makes better sense to try to mediate the matter rather than file litigation.
The courts are the ultimate arbitrators on custody matters — but that is the “nuclear option” and frequently unnecessary. With mediation, the two co-parents agree on a solution to their issue and that usually makes for a happier result.